Don't let me go
by Faith777
Summary: James has always had a thing for Logan, but Logan is afraid of getting close with James because he doesn't want to lose James as a friend. When James and Logan are left together in a small apartment for the first time in two years, will James be able to control himself for Logan's sake, or will Logan finally give into James' demand?


If you don't like the pairing of James/Logan than do not read.

JAGAN!

Rated M

Enjoy

Don't let me go

James' P.O.V

I was getting hard just by watching Logan concentrate on the educational television show before him. So I decided to go join him on the love sofa. I jumped on the couch from behind making the small boy yelp.

I saw the fear in Logan's eyes when he saw that it was me. I hated that Logan gets uncomfortable when it's just me and him all alone. "J-James what are you doing?"

"Can't I watch television with my favorite person?" I said smirking.

"Y-Yes, just stay on your side of the couch," Logan said. He blushed scooting as far away from me as he was able to.

"Relax Logan; I won't do anything, unless you want me to." I said scooting towards him putting my arm around his shoulders pulling him so close he was practically on my lap, which got me more aroused than before.

"James, get off of me. I don't believe you; you try to force yourself on me every day." Logan said trying to squirm out of my strong grasp.

"I don't do it every day, but I at least stop when you tell me to." I said.

"JAMES, STOP!" Logan yelled.

I let go of him. "Fine, but you can't avoid me forever!" I yelled back at him.

"Well, I sure as can try." His voice was like a knife stabbing me in the heart.

"Logan, I love you and I know you feel the same way, I can feel it. You know that no one loves you as I do; I would do anything for you. I will be anything you want me to be, just tell me what to do, and I will do it." I said in a soft begging voice.

"James, no it doesn't work like that, please stop this."

"How can I stop something that hasn't started yet? Logan you haven't even gave me a chance, how can I prove myself to you if you won't let me? You don't have the right to tell me you don't have feelings for me if you don't let yourself fall in love with someone who would move the Earth for you." I felt my face burn as I was close to tears, wanting Logan to give me a chance.

"James, I know what I want, and it isn't you, I'm sorry."

Logan got up, but I reached for his arm as I grabbed his hand and got down on my knees. "Logan, one date that is all I'm asking for. If it goes bad, and you tell me that it still can't work out then I will leave you alone forever, but I can't get over you if you don't let me see what it's like to have you for an hour or so." I begged looking in Logan's large brown eyes.

"James get up, the answer is no, and it will always be no, you just have to accept that."

I got up and pushed Logan against the wall, holding his wrists above his head. "James, stop, let go of me. Kendall!" Logan screamed.

"Do you really have to call him out here every time?" I complained.

"Well, you at least stop when he tells you to." Logan snapped at me.

"Do you always have to have your boyfriend fight your battles for you?"

"He isn't my boyfriend."

"He might as well be since you won't let me have you."

It hurts knowing that Kendall has a better chance at loving my Logan than me. I can't help but want to punch Kendall in the face when Kendall rubs that fact in my face, I know Kendall has feelings for Logan, but Logan refuses to believe it. Kendall isn't fooling me.

"James, what Kendall and I have are friend-ship and nothing more, you know that." Logan said in a soft voice.

"James, what the hell, how many times do I have to tell you that Logan is off limits and Logan will never want you like that." I heard Kendall's voice ring through my ears.

My eyes began watering as Logan pushed me away from him. "What is your problem Kendall?" I was very upset and wasn't sure how long Kendall would have to push me until I lost it.

"What's my problem, what's yours? You have to stop pushing yourself on Logan, you scare him. He is scared you will hurt him, so just leave him alone." Kendall said.

I felt my heart break a little, hearing that from Kendall. "You're lying, I would never hurt Logan. If anything he should be scared of you, I would protect Logan from anything that would try and hurt him."

"James, you beat someone up once a week. You can't control your anger issues. I think that is a good reason to be afraid of someone." Kendall said.

I turned to Logan who looked frightened. I moved a little closer to him not wanting to scare him off, and I was afraid that Kendall was right. "Logan you know I would never do anything to hurt you like that, I know I have anger issues and sometimes it gets out of control, but I could never hurt you. Do you understand Logan?" I said softly moving a step closer to him. Logan moved a step back in fear. I let a few tears fall from my eyes.

"See I told you Logan thinks you're a freak." Kendall said enjoying this moment.

"I would shut up if I were you right now," I said. I was trying to think of a reason why I shouldn't punch him right now, and I was coming up blank.

"I bet you want to punch me right now, don't you?" Kendall challenged me.

"Kendall, knock it off." Logan said to Kendall.

I felt Logan touch the lower part of my back, making me relax instantly, "James, its ok, please don't hurt Kendall." Logan begged me.

"I won't hurt you because you're not worth it." I said to Kendall. I left the room defeated and hurt that Logan was afraid of me, but I knew there would come a time where I will be able to prove myself to Logan, and he won't be able to resist me any longer.

I stormed off to my bedroom, defeated and tired. I wanted to punch anything that got in my way, but I didn't want to scare Logan anymore than I have. I have spent most of my life trying to impress Logan. If he doesn't want me now he will never want me, and I have to learn to accept that. I fell on my bed and cried for the rest of the night.

* * *

I woke up full of energy and was ready to take on the world. I got ready and headed to the kitchen to find a working Logan in the kitchen.

"Where is Mama Knight?" I asked Logan.

"She brought Katie to the salon, girl's day or something," Logan said. Not once did he look up at me.

"What about Kendall and Carlos? They are usually up before me."

"They went out grocery shopping, so they will probably be gone all day."

I could tell Logan was fidgeting at the fact that we are probably going to be home alone for most of the day. I decided to give him space, knowing Logan likes to be alone. I made my way to the room that we shared.

**Half Hour Later**

I was sitting on my bed reading the new fashion magazine as I heard Logan enter our bed room, I could tell that he was getting annoyed that I haven't been giving him attention like I usually do, and I was enjoying it.

"Hey, James?"

I looked up to see Logan in only a pair of tight boxer briefs. I quickly looked away trying to hide my blush behind my magazine. "Yes, Logan?"

"I know that we haven't been talking much since you told me about the feelings you have for me, but I want us to get over that and have every thing to go back to normal." Logan said as he sat down on my bed, dangerously close to me.

"I would like that, but it's kind of hard to get over the fact that your best friend is scared of you." I said getting over dramatic.

"James, I'm not scared of you, I know that you would never hurt me."

"Then why didn't you say something to Kendall the other day?"

"I don't know, I was afraid that you were going to beat up Kendall," Logan said getting shy.

"Of course you don't want me to beat up your boyfriend." I said walking on thin ice.

"James, he isn't my boyfriend." Logan said rolling his eyes.

"Well how come you care if Kendall gets beat up and I don't?" I said defensively.

"Of course, I care if you would get hurt, but I also know you can kick his ass if you wanted to, and I just don't want you to do something you would regret later because Kendall is your friend too." Logan said.

"Yeah, I guess, even if he is an ass sometimes." I said.

"So I was thinking since we are going to be home alone today we could hang out today?" Logan said hopeful.

"Are you serious right now?" I said shocked.

"Yes, I want to."

"Wow, the two of us haven't hung out together since I told you I liked you two years ago."

"Yup, just the two of us, but you can't force your self on me." Logan warned.

"I won't, well of course you want me to, and I know you secretly do." I smiled.

Logan laughed, "You never give up do you?"

"When I see something I like, I go after it, especially if it's worth the wait."

"Well you might have to wait a long time my friend." Logan answered.

"We'll see about that."

Logan got dressed in his day clothes. "So do you want to watch a movie?" Logan questioned me.

"Sounds good," I put my magazine away and followed Logan out into the living room.

"What kind of movie do you feel like watching?" Logan asked me.

"How about a Romance Comedy?"

"I think we should watch an action movie." Logan quickly said.

"Action is fine too." I had no intentions to watch an action movie ever. I get lost and bored during action movies, but if Logan wanted to watch an action movie, and then we were going to watch one.

I sat on the couch with a sigh, hoping Logan didn't hear it. Logan put a movie in and sat on the couch next to me.

I felt my thoughts drifting off and thinking about the current relationship I had with Logan, and how we are just friends and nothing more. I am angry at the thought that Logan can't even give me a chance, and go on a date. I have to confront Logan about it. It was only an hour into the movie, but the question is on the back of my brain, and I need to hear the answer.

"Why don't you like me more than a friend?" I blurted out.

"James, you said you weren't going to do this to me." Logan complained.

"How come you can't even give me a chance?" I demanded

"Drop it James, I am watching a movie."

"No, not until you give me an answer." I crossed my arms, waiting for my answer.

"James, I can't."

"Why not, I deserve an answer Logan; you can't just leave me hanging forever." I moved my free hand on his face as my thumb ran over his lips. Logan was frozen; he didn't know what to do. "Let me kiss you." I whispered lightly.

Logan's breath hitched in his throat. I took that as a yes as I leaned down; I was inches away from his lips, his eyes closed as he was getting ready for me to kiss him. I licked my lips nervous that this could be what determines if Logan wants me or not. My hand brushed across his cheek, making him shiver slightly. I lightly put my shivering lips to his as our lips touched for the first time. I felt Logan grab a hold of my hair with both of his hands. I pulled away to see if what I was doing was ok. I looked at his smiling face as he moved his head towards mine; I decided to meet him half way. Logan moaned against my lips as he pushed his tongue into my mouth. Logan's tongue was everywhere, I loved it. I moaned with him, I felt the urge to need more of him.

I grabbed his wrists and pinned him underneath my body on the couch. "James," he squeaked. I moaned as my erection was against his slightly aroused erection. I lowered my body, so my lips were brushing against his ear, "I told you that you liked the attention, I can feel you Logan. I know you want me." I pushed our hips together, looking into his eyes as he was staring into mine. His face was beat red and was slightly panting. Our noses were pressed together as I took one of my hands off of his wrist and slowly moved it down his whole body until it reached his belt on his jeans. I unbuckled his belt with one hand, my eyes never left his.

I have never gotten this far with anyone before. I have no intentions on doing something Logan would not want to do. I always stop when Logan tells me to, I would never hurt Logan.

"James," Logan whined. "Yes Logan, do you like it when I take control over you? I always knew that you would give in to me. I've heard your wet dreams, where you would moan my name. I have never been turned on so badly before, do you know how hard it is for me to see you and not be able to touch you?" I said.

My free hand slid in Logan's pants, I moved my hand over his clothed area. "James, I can't. I-I don't, I can't, please." Logan whined.

We were closer than we have ever been. I decided to move my hand under his boxers, feeling him for the first time. I kissed and bit at his neck leaving bruises. "James, no I can't, it's too much." Logan was a moaning mess underneath me. I loved the way he would moan my name.

"Yes, you can. Logan come for me, let me love you." I said in his neck. "I-I, uh James, I'm close." "I know baby, it's almost over." I said as I kissed his nose. I let go of his other writs as I started pumping myself as I was also close. I felt Logan come all over my hand and on his shirt. I soon came after. I lay down on Logan as both of us panted heavily against one another.

I closed my eyes listening to the sound of Logan's heart beat slowing down. It was like a lullaby.

"James, this was a mistake, and it should have never happened."

I opened my eyes, hoping I heard wrong or maybe I'm having a bad dream. "What?" I said confused.

"James, I don't want to make our friend-ship confusing for us."

"It doesn't have to be, Logan I love you, and we can be more than friends." I said hoping Logan was just messing with me.

"James, I don't want to be more than friends."

"Why didn't you say that before I took your pants off?" It felt like Logan used me, I got up and zipped my pants back up.

"I tell you that every day." Logan said upset.

"Well you didn't tell me to stop."

"What am I supposed to do? Tell you no for the rest of my life?" Logan questioned me. Logan got off the couch and zipped his pants up.

I walked over to Logan and put one of his hands in mine. "You liked it, and you know it, I don't understand why you can't just be with me? I don't know why you bother to push me away; I know you want me, as badly as I want you."

No, I don't want anything to do with you!" Logan yelled.

I could see on Logan's face that he knew I was hurt. Logan's face was soft but upset. "James we are never going to happen, ok. I'm sorry if that makes you sad, but I don't have feelings for you, and I never will." Logan said in a soft apologetic voice. I could tell Logan was close to tears.

"It's because of Kendall isn't it, I said letting go of his hand. I looked away from his eyes; I don't want to know the truth because I know it will hurt that Kendall gets to have one thing I crave, the line to my existence.

"James… it isn't like that," Logan said unsure of him.

"Logan, don't lie to me, I see the way he looks at you, and he wants you. I wouldn't be surprised if you wanted him too." I started to leave the room, not being able to take the pain.

"Wait don't leave, James stop, please." Logan grabbed my hand begging for me to stay. I felt my heart do the happy dance. "I don't like Kendall like that, he is a friend and nothing more, I promise. No matter how much will beg I will never give in."

I put a smile to my face. "You might be able to say no to him, but not to me, I can see it on your face. You can't avoid me forever because there is a part of you that needs me. It's just in denial right now. I moved our intertwined hands on my chest where my heart is. "Do you feel that? It beats for you only."

"James, stop, this isn't right."

"How is me loving you with all of my might wrong to you?"

"I just want to be friends and nothing more than that." Logan said.

"You love the attention I give you, and you know it," I said.

"I think you are just full of yourself, and need to get over me." Logan said.

"If you just wanted to be friends you should have told me to stop because now you lost a friend."

"I didn't tell you to stop because I'm afraid." Logan said shaking.

"You're scared of me? How many times do I have to tell you that I would never hurt you?" I said. I was upset that Logan lied to me about being afraid of me.

"James wait, I am scared."

"I know, I think you made that clear." I said with anger.

"I'm not scared of you, I'm scared that you will disappear from my life because you are my closest friend and I can't lose you." Logan said with tears in his eyes.

I felt my heart shatter at the thought of losing Logan in my life. I'm glad that he felt the same way. "I could never leave you; I love you too much for that."

"James what if we're not meant to be together and we break up, I don't think I will be able to lose you." Logan said.

"Trust me, we are."

"How do you know?"

"I know because I will do everything in my power to keep us together."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

We kissed sealing the deal.

"What the hell, James!" I heard Kendall yelling at me.

Logan and I jumped not expecting Kendall and Carlos back from the grocery store so early.

"It's ok Kendall, were kind of dating," Logan said. He looked up at me with a large smile.

"Congratulations guys," Carlos said giving both of us a big hug.

"You guys are what?" Kendall questioned.

"You heard Logan." I said smirking.

"What ever Logan, your loss." Kendall said putting groceries away.

"Are we really dating?" I whispered in Logan's ear when Kendall and Carlos were preoccupied with groceries.

"Do you want to be my boyfriend?"

"Yes, of course I do!" I answered.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Later that night~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Not going to sleep with me tonight?" I pouted. "We can just cuddle; I can behave when I want to."

"No, James, that sounds like a bad idea."

"Why, because you know you won't be able to control yourself?" I questioned.

"Everyone is home, and I don't want to take that risk." Logan said.

"Every one is asleep, no one is going to." I said convincingly.

I heard Logan sigh as he found his way over to my bed. I lifted the covers inviting him in, and he gladly slid in and wrapped his arms around my waist

"Good night James."

"Good night, sexy." I can finally fall asleep peacefully, and knowing that Logan and I have a wonderful future to look forward to.

**~THE END~**

**Hopefully there weren't too many mistakes…**

**I know the ending sucked, but it's Jagan so Yay**


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